Happy New Year!

I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! It has been a whirlwind for us traveling to see family and just the normal hustle and bustle of the season. I always hate it when New Year's is over because that means it's time to take down the Christmas decorations for another year.

There has been a lot happening around hear over the last few days, so I have been on a creating frenzy I guess from nervous energy. I will have a lot more to post over the next few days once I get all of the pictures taken.

These are what I made for my girls' teachers for Christmas presents. The pictures turned out a little blurry so it's hard to see that these ornaments are actually 3D on the inside. I cut out different parts of the pictures and raised them as well as added other embellishments too.

This is a mixed media assemblage that I finished yesterday. I have not created many assemblage pieces, but this is very addicting! I'm sure I will be making more. I have all kinds of ideas for more running through my head...maybe I should sketch them out in my sketch book before I forget!

I do ask for as many prayers for my brother as possible right now. He is in ICU fighting for his life with severe pneumonia and sepsis. He was admitted to the hospital on Tuesday with what they thought was just severe pneumonia, but shortly after they got there he began having seizures and they quickly determined that he was in septic shock. He put off going to the doctor because he didn't realize how sick he was. It is really hard for me because of my health and immune system the way that it is I can't go to the hospital or even in the house at my parents' where he has been. I just sit an wait between their visiting hours every 2 hours for updates and word for the slightest improvement. Anyways, he (as well as my parents) can use all of the prayers they can get right now.

My Favorite Time of the Year

I love this time of year. There is something about the Christmas season that tends to bring out the best in people. You see more people smiling and sharing during this time more than any other time of the year. The Christmas music is another one of my favorite things. I LOVE listening to Christmas music while I do things around the house and in my art studio. The best part of all, though is watching the excitement in my girls. Just seeing how what may be simple things to us are just amazing to them. It is easy to remember the special parts of Christmas and the Reason why we have Christmas by watching them. They truly are inspiring, and they make everyone enjoy this time even more.

I do dread the day that they no longer believe in Santa. There are several reasons for this as well. The first is something that I used to never understand why my parents said this, but now being a parent myself I totally understand: I enjoy "being" Santa as much, if not more than how I loved it when I was a little girl that believed in Santa. The other reason, well let's just say I might be put on Santa's naughty list for this one: I use it as my weapon on the girls (shame on me). I have them believing that Santa is always watching and that he has special ways of watching them when they are at home through the Christmas trees in the house and their advent calendar, and that we have a conference call with Santa every night to talk about how good they have been each day. Believe me, they are on their very best of behavior for the month of December, and all I have to say is that he is watching and they quickly straighten up. I am sure one of these days that will come back to bite me when they realize that all of that is not true, but as for now, it helps! This is also the first year that I have pictures of them with Santa when at least one of them is not either terrified and crying, or trying to escape as quicly as possible, or both!



I have been able to spend more time in my art studio lately, and have several things to show pictures of, but for now, these are my two latest creations.



Several people have asked about what is going on with my possible leukemia, and to make it as short as possible, the doctors have determined that I do not have leukemia "....yet." What this means is that the tests and biopsies all came back showing that it is currently negative, but could turn to leukemia at any time. I have all of the things in my blood that apparently shows all of the signs of it, but aren't quite high enough to be considered leukemia just yet. We just have to hope and pray that it never turns into that, but as for now they have determined that I have advanced Lupus and Vasculitis. I go back this week to get the final results on all of that and to begin a treatment plan that will hopefullly, start getting me back on track to feel at least a little better.

Seeking Answers

You would think as much waiting for answers as we have had to do lately that I would be getting better at this waiting game, but I am starting to run out of patience. I know it takes a while to determine a serious diagnosis, but my gosh! this is ridiculous! Every time I turn around I am having to do another blood test, ct scan, and x-ray then waiting in between for answers and just news of more tests. I did have a bone marrow biopsy yesterday (ouch!), and we are hoping that this will finally give us some answers. They are telling me it should be some time Monday or Tuesday before we have any kind of preliminary results. I am anxious and scared, but also just ready for some sort of answer and treatment. I am at the point where all I want is to just figure this out so that I can get some form of treatment and to get on with my life. Anyways, as soon as I know something I will try to post it.

I am still on "house rest" so I am not really supposed to leave the house and get into public places besides going to the doctor, but sometimes I get cabin fever and have to get out a little. I am very weak however, and do have to rest a lot. I try to spend time in my studio when I feel like it, but it is getting to where I feel like it less and less now. I do have a couple pictures of some paintings that I have made that are in this post, and I have several other projects that I have ready to take pictures to upload, but have not had a chance yet.



On a much lighter note - aren't my two little trick-or-treaters adorable!? Ashlyn is a car hop, Megan is a soda pop girl, and Memphis was an angel for about 2 minutes until we just had to put on her light up t shirt!






Hugs!
Stacy

Waiting and Hoping...

Once again, it's been a while since I have posted. I have had quite a bit going on since my last post, and mine and my family's lives right now are turned upside down. I have a lot of family and friends out there that would like to know how everything is going, and I was hoping to know more before I posted.

For those of you who don't know, my doctors seem to think that I have leukemia. They have been watching my blood work over the past few years, and my numbers keep climbing higher and higher. I have started showing a lot of symptoms of it, and they are running tons of tests on me. We just have to keep waiting and waiting for results, each time getting reports back that are pointing to leukemia. There is a small glimmer of hope that it could be something else related to medications that they have had me on, but not that likely because the numbers started climbing before those were given to me. More than likely, if I do have it, it will hopefully be the chronic kind and not the acute form. The "chronic" form of leukemia is easier to treat with a higher life expectancy rate, which is good. Not to fret, I am a survivor and have been through a lot of medical things the last few years, and I can handle whatever comes my way. That's what I have to keep telling myself. I have two beautiful girls, a wonderful husband, and an amazing family to live for and to fight for. We just keep holding on to that small glimmer of hope that it is something else.

During all of this, I don't know what we would have done without my parents. Like my Father-in-law said, "they are the angel wings" holding our family together right now. They stay with us during the week and do everything for me - cooking, cleaning, laundry, getting the girls to and from school, grocery shopping, etc. I have been confined to "house rest" meaning I can't do anything at all except rest and cannot leave the house except to go to the doctor so as not to put myself at risk for any form of infection. I don't know what we would do without them, and it is so hard and frustrating to me to have to let go of the reigns and let these two wonderful people who are twice my age handle everything for me. It is such an amazing act of love and selfless thing to do to give up their lives for me during this time. Hopefully we will know something for sure soon so that I can get on with my treatment and work on getting well. They just have to do every test possible so as to make an accurate diagnosis, and we just have to be patient. That's the hard part...I'm running out of patience. I want to find out what it is and get on with it. This waiting is hard...very hard.

On a lighter note, because of all of this I have been spending a lot of time in my studio, and have done quite a few pieces. I will be posting them as I get the pictures taken. It is interesting to step back and look at what I've done and how the current situation affects my work. It is much deeper than before, and you can see my form of expression without me even realizing at the time that I am doing it. I have always said that my art is my release, my therapy, and my form of expressing my deepest feelings, and this is definitely true right now. I'm so glad I can turn to it right now and to be able to forget about what's going on around me while I am in the "create mode." I have run into artist block several times, but am usually able to get past it by browsing through my books, magazines, and internet for inspiration. It doesn't take long before I am back in there creating.

I will try to keep everyone posted as much as possible through my blog, I know a lot of family and friends visit often to see if I have posted anything that I have learned, and I promise I will keep you updated as I get results back.

These are ATC's that I created for the "A Little Birdie Told Me" swap from one of my Yahoo ATC groups.

Trying to Catch Up

Wow, I am having the hardest time catching up! As I mentioned before, I ended up getting really sick with severe bronchitis, and finally after 3 weeks, I am finally getting better. I am just trying to get my strength back while fighting this flare, and it has really put me behind on things - especially my blog. I have only painted just a few things during this time, and am so ready to get back into my studio! Since my last post, my girls have both started school - now my baby is in kindergarten! sniff..sniff... They have also started gymnastics. I decided it was time after I tried to show them a straight somersault, and I swear I heard every bone in my body crack! I just laid there for a while doing a system check - o.k. my toes move, now my legs move, etc. To sum it up - it's best to leave that stuff to the professionals to teach my girls. I officially think I am too old.
This is a picture of the girls on their first day of school. They looked so cute! Although, I'm not sure how much longer they are going to let me dress them alike. They let me occasionally, but it is getting fewer and farther between. The only thing different about what they were wearing, is that Ashlyn absolutely refuses to wear bows anymore. "First graders do NOT wear bows, Mommy!"

Here are a few paintings that I did manage to finish over the last couple of weeks. I have to explain how my very creative daughter had a part in the "Bird on a Tree" painting. The girls had been down at my parents for a few days. Both of them are extremely creative, and good little artists in their own right. They both are fully aware of how I am always on the lookout for something to put in my art. They love to help me look through old books for pages for backgrounds and looking at different ephemera. Well, while they were all supposed to be getting ready to leave to come back home, and Ashlyn slipped off and collected several pieces of the prettiest thin bark pieces for me to use in my art. She put them in a little gift sack and wrote my name on it. She managed to get in their car with it, and make it all the way home without anyone noticing her precious little gift. Everyone was just amazed when she presented it to me that she for one, was so sneaky about it, but mainly that she put that much creative thought into finding me something that I could use in my paintings. I was just so touched and amazed that she did this. So, the first painting I did after that, I incorporated into the bird painting. She is very pleased and just tickled pink that I used something that she found in my painting!